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After a while boy I began slapping the counter like Kramer when he saw DiMaggio, but that didn't do anything except make the sheet cake lady flee. What the hell, man? It was the customer care counter, or whatever they call it, and nobody was there. What are they trying to say to me?! In a huff I went and bought my lard parcel through one of the self-serve lanes, and barged out of there boy with an attitude boy that nobody noticed or cared about. I sped across the street to one of those giant Sheetz gasoline complexes, where I planned to buy my two Powerball quick-picks. Because, as it's been documented, you can't win it if you ain't in it. I went inside and there was a line of people stretched halfway back to the soda coolers, and that's a long way. "Sweet Jesus!" I hollered without thinking, and several people laughed.
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